apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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