I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize