i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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