Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Randomize