When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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