my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize