I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
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We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
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We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize