Kiss
Puke
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
lets start a swedish sibling band together
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
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