This girl is more easily done than said...
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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