if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
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I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I am never drinking with the goths again.
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Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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