I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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