It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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