I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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