If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize