you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
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