I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Randomize