Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
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Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
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