it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize