He uses pillows to masturbate.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize