So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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