My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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