Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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