Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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