I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
do herpes really smell.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize