just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
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