So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize