I'm gonna have a badass scar
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I need water and some morals
Randomize