Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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