Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize