Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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