Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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