I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
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