Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
if only i could text you this smell
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize