How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
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Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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