do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
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