I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize