okay pat passed out under dana's car
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
whose parrot is this?
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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