I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
It's blow job season.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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