roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I love you. Go after that dick
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