So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
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