Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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