I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
