oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize