do herpes really smell.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
I need to calm my uterus...
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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