just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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