i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
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after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
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Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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