Farmville is her only friend.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize