walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize