He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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