I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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