Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize